Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Querida....

Dear you,
I think that as much as I don't want to admit it (or to the people who I have), I think that you're the person who has succeeded in filling in this hole that has been created in my heart. Because I can't even go up to you to tell you this, I am going to express it here. 

Sitting at work last night, all I could think about was you sitting across from me. Behind your laptop screen, complaining about all that you complain about. Allow me to go back to when I first saw you. I can still remember it. My head was pounding, louder than the beats of drums of a marching band. I was ready to fall and crash. You had on your sunglasses and the biggest grin I've ever seen. You were dancing too. At that point, all I could do was stare and keep my thoughts to myself. But I wondered who you were. I never really saw you much. But never mind that, you quickly became someone in the past. 



Soon time passed and the humidity rolled over. Little did I know that we had much in common. Funnily, I've never even talked to you in person and yet I felt like I could relate to you in ways I never thought possible. I looked forward to talking to you almost every day when I was seated before the computer. You told me stories about your high maintenance and I told you about my self recovery from my recent pain. 



Then I remember jumping in joy at the thought that I could leave this campus even though I just got back not long ago. I was also mentally preparing myself for a day I never wanted to face... Today. I had a big fear of feeling this way and kept myself on guard. I've heard one too many tales but something in me decided to watch you unfold your story. Not long after, I found myself beginning to question myself and my feelings. I guess you didn't know just how big of an impact you've made on me. Religion wise, interaction, social wise. In all those times I've spent with you, I hear myself reflecting upon a lot of things after. 

The turning point happened when I saw you letting your guard down. Something I've never seen you done before and when I really began questioning my feelings. Plus the comfort level I felt with you was beyond me. Me remembering my pledge to avoid feeling how I feel today, I did my best to not show them and did what I could within my powers to defend myself from letting you think I cared more than I should...

... This went on a little longer than I expected 
because it soon 
seemed as though we were playing hide and seek

That long stretch of hide and seek played its tricks on me and could be seen tossing and turning at bedtime trying to fall asleep, fighting back the resistant to stay awake. 
Just a few days ago, however, I came to the realization that you are quite the asshole. A quote once stated "if someone really cares about you, they will do all they can to be with you. No lies, no excuses and no broken promises" and you were the perfect example of this. All those days of going places, zero-ed in into nothingness. Your foolish ways and your heartless like face wear, which you so happen to call your (something that can be changed if you wanted to) reality. All those days of commonality are now our hi-bye seconds. Our times of laughing and talking, have evolved into forced conversations (or at least forced from how I see it). 


Either way, as of now, all I know that I face the reality of my feelings. My roommate was right. This was bound to happen. My carelessness had led me to this and as much as I've tried to hold this back till the day you walk up that stage, I no longer have the capacity to keep it to myself or to the couple of people I've talked to regarding this. No longer do I have the strength. So, this is me. Saying this. 

Friday, April 22, 2011

Have You Met My Friend Julia?

I know, I said I'd put up pictures of me and my dear Julia.

Here they are:









Okay. I'm basically uploading the same things up on Facebook so if ya like, go to Facebook ;) 

I love this woman by the way. She's like my rock, my shoulder to cry on and my anchor :) I can't imagine life without her. :) Its a surprise we never took pictures together before this. Well, we did but like 2. And I'm glad I now have something that I get to keep forever :) 

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Reasons Why I Love You

I was reblogging stuff from Tumblr as I always do.
And I saw this:


This was the picture she was talking about.

Reading this post made me really happy. I love this woman and her post on Tumblr just made my day. :) 

Thank you Cik Nawwar :)  ♥ 



Bootifuls ;) 

Thursday, April 7, 2011

We Met on Thanksgiving and I Fell Head Over Heels

I am in love.


We met on Thanksgiving.

I was in grey but you were in pink and black. You stood there on your lonesome surrounded by everyone else.

Everyone looked pretty in their own way and thought you looked simple, you were gorgeous.

You smelled like heaven and all I wanted to be was with you.

But I ended up not and now I know...

I'm in love.

With youuuuuu!

TEEHEE :)

OMG you guys. I LOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEE this perfume!!!!!!!!!!! :) It smells soooo amazingggggggggggggggggggggg GAH LOVE LOVE LOVE I have it on me now and I can't stop showing it off NYAHAHAHHAHAHAHA ;) 

I wanna go buy it now. ><

Monday, April 4, 2011

You Make Me Dance

I competed in hight jump for the first time in my life on Saturday

It was kinda disappointing because I didn't clear anything. I wish I could've cleared at lease oneeee :(

Made me kinda sad. :(
 But on the good note, I had a photoshoot with Julia yesterday and I'm excited to show more :D


This is my profile picture for now :) I will upload em later ;) 
Keep yer eyes pealed for em! :) 
HEHEHEEHE

Anywho....
YA like?? :)