So today, I woke up at 9.35am, freaking out thinking I only had 25 minutes to get my ass off the bed, get ready and get to the City Center to my orthodontist for my 10am appointment.
RUSH RUSH SPEED VROOM VROOM
I get there at well, 10.30, there was a jam and the parking lot was a bitch, most of them were reserved!
Anyway. I get there, get out of the car, into the main block to the shop lot and
is all I see.
Immediately. I remembered that they're closed on Mondays.
ER MER GERD.
Not very happy, I started making my way back towards the parking lot when I realized that I had no small change to pay for parking. So I did another U-turn and LO & BEHOLD. FOOOOOOD! :)
I stopped and had my breakfast. I had sat closest to the entrance, facing out and something catches my eyes.
so pretty
Even though I had a book with me, like I always do whenever I go out, I had decided to just sit there and take in the view of my city, my home. I swear, I could stare at it forever. Then when my food came, I savored every last bite of it while I tried absorbing more of the view that lay before my eyes.
Quite frankly, I feel that no one in my country actually really really appreciates home. Regardless of whatever country you're in, no one really appreciates it. For my country, well, we're always complaining about how shitty it is. Er, dude, trust me, I DON'T deny that statement. ESPECIALLY in certain aspects of our country, such as the shitty services, the POORLY POORLY organized urban planning (to name a few). But, all in all, our country ain't all that bad.
It took me three years and the living in two different continents of the world to realize that. You see, rewind back to all those years before I left, or even began college....
1990
I was born into an English speaking family. My parents brought me up speaking English. And pretty much, English only. My Sundays were usually filled with watching Sesame Street or some Disney movie or another.
1997
I attended Primary school. It was an ALL CHINESE speaking school. Everything learnt was in Chinese (more specifically, Mandarin), but of course you still had to take Malay and English on the side, that was a must. Oh trust me, I HATED it for the longest time. And for the first 2 years, I had pretty much gone to school not really knowing exactly what was going on and boy oh boy, did I hate my parents for getting caned in school without knowing why. I tried finding those who spoke more English than Mandarin and stuck to them more.
Fast Forward to 2003 (GASP, 9 years ago!)
My first year of high school. Liberated from my Chinese only environment, I detested the idea of taking Chinese as a subject on it's own. Mom gave me an ultimatum that later resulted in my discontentment to stay back, after school hours for it. Plus, my teacher was rather psycho anyway. He spent most of his time comparing us to his old students and lecturing us on our behavior instead of actually teaching us. Was not very happy, as you can imagine.
Also... YAY American TV! You name it, I've seen it. I yearn so much to go to the places I see on TV.
2005
I had seen the last of the traditional proverbs and had enough of trying to decipher ancient letters and interpreting them. OH HELL YES. But now, I can even recite to you the names of the actors and characters from any show.
2008
I will never forget the one day when I was trying to write some simple sentences in Mandarin. But I couldn't even write the simplest, most basic of words. I was dying in shame while my friend (who I asked for help) laughed at me. T'was the saddest day of my life.
2009.
I had just arrived in Southern California to attend college. It was like a dream come true and I had wanted so much to blend in immediately. To speak with an American accent (possibly a more Californian one than anything else) and to completely leave behind my very own culture, and background.
2011
Being in Barcelona, sucking horribly at Spanish, not speaking a word of Catalan, except for the word "bathroom", Mandarin somehow managed to save my ass a couple of times.
Today, I'm reflecting upon the last 4 years and what that has done to me. You know how they say you never know what you have till it's gone? Well, I had gone, cause OBVIOUSLY the country can't go anywhere else, physically. And I can say that I have an intensified love for my country, the diversity, and things that make it uniquely Malaysia. Really, I'm truly truly thankful for the education I've gotten from home. Okay, it may not be the BEST, but in terms of the flexibility it has given me and my fellow Malaysians, I think we've got THAT much covered, at least.
Seriously, it helps so much with language learning, and sometimes even conversing is much easier. We can travel to a bunch of places without having to worry about language as much. And the food, oh my god, the food. One of the BIGGEST things I miss when I'm away.
If you really don't like this country, I can't really say I blame you. It can feel suffocating sometimes. And they always say, "the grass looks greener on the other side" and they're right. It always does. Even when you've gone to the other side, you'll say the same about home. (which, allow me to add, that we should all try living, YES, LIVING in a different country for at least a FULL year)
Malaysia = Home
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